SHE LOVES ME, SHE LOVES ME NOT....


Imagine a brother attending a talk, supposed to be a Halal environment. After the talk when all the people gathered start to leave, on the way the brother happens to glance upon a sister. Shaytan makes the brother think  “ Oh Masha Allah, this sister is very active. She would become a good wife”. Shaytan also puts into the mind of the brother ”DO IT THE HALAL WAY”. The brother approaches the sister and asks her for her father’s number. The sister gives her father’s number. This is how brothers and sisters fall into the trap of shaytan. Shaytan plans to stop the brother to call that sister’s father, makes him think I don’t know much about her, her family... then how should I call her father and create a big confusion. Let me know about the sister then things will be easy. After few days, in another talk (HALAL) they also xchange their personal mail id’s. The sister thinks that this brother is really very nice..so she says “Insha Allah I will pray Salaat Ul Istikhara..they start conversing with each other more... and we know how things progress from there. This is how Shaytan makes us feel that we are doing the right thing and HALAL way. From a point where there was no conversation at all, he created a situation where the brother, sister and he (shaytan) are alone. Slowly and steadily shaytan makes them win his race and they become the loser.

This scenario could have stopped at any point before things go worse. Yes, it could have ended at the point where the brother after looking at that sister for the first time, could have lowered his gaze. And it could have also stopped at a point where the sister should have not given her mail id. After these things have happened, there is very little chance of escaping from shaytan.


Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) said: The Prophet (PBUH) said, "Allah has written the very portion of Zina which a man will indulge in. There will be no escape from it. The Zina of the eye is the (lustful) look, the Zina of the ears is the listening (to voluptuous songs or talk), the Zina of the tongue is (the licentious) speech, the Zina of the hand is the (lustful) grip, the Zina of the feet is the walking (to the place where he intends to commit Zina), the heart yearns and desires and the private parts approve all that or disapprove it.''
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

But sad to say that it is this culture which has harmed many youths life. Every deen has its distignuished feature and our feature as muslims is “HAYA”. This is what differentiate us from others. During prophet(pbuh), in the market places, men and women use to walk freely. Prophet(pbuh) use to say Itlaa Itlaa for the women to make way for men. After free mixing of male and female was prohibited, he made it very clear that females should walk through the market close to the edges and men to walk through the middle. The messenger of Allah had made it very clear, in fact categorically clear to the extent that there is a massive punishment for a man who touch a foreign female. Here are the words from the hadeeth: ‘It is better for you that a metal rod be plunged into your head than that you should touch a female who is not lawful for you’.

Can you imagine this, on the day of judgement..a metal rod plunged into your head....how would you feel…and can you imagine it here in this duniya..it is better for you to take a metal rod and plunge it into your head than to touch or look at a foreign female. If you walk down the streets now a days, you can find many Laila – Majnu, Heer – Ranjha & Romeo-Juliet. Sad to see our muslim brothers and sisters also amongst them. Is this what Islam tells us?
‘O youth, who ever amongst you has the means of getting married,should do so because it lowers the gaze and protects the private parts;and whosoever does not have the ability, should fast, for indeed, it is a protection for him.'(Bukhari). This hadeeth specifically refers to the youth..as youth your desires are more strong. To avoid getting into something Haram, it is better that you get married. How many out of the youth today are getting married when they reach the age of marriage. Youth is busy with careers, getting settled and few also think that they cant afford it. I heard one of the Guy saying this: “Being single is like cool..you can do what you want, you don’t have to cry, no need to worry about your partner. you can live your life”.

If you see the school girls who are barely 12-16, when you observe them they think and behave as if they are ready for marriage, straight away. The way they dress up as if they are married women, the way they talk sometimes,even. But due to the trend of late marriage nowadays, getting married at the right age is definitely not “IN”. But we need to think about this  as an issue which is harming our deen, our society might not accept it but we need to do things which our deen allows and stay away from those things which our deen does not allow.

I am sure those brothers who are reading this there will be some who need to get marriage, and also who are married. If you are not married then get married. And if you are married, then get married again if you can do justice, Insha Allah.Next time you look at a sister, then think about a metal rod being plunged into your head. And refrain from things which are shameful. Get married and say that : I LOVE YOU rather than having a Haram relationship to opt for a chance to say: SHE LOVES ME, SHE LOVES ME NOT….
Written by: ARIF MOHAMMED
Jazak Allahu Khairan for reading.
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