Islam. I live for it: lowering gazes

Showing posts with label lowering gazes. Show all posts

Praise be to Allaah.

Sexual desire is something that has been created in man and it cannot be got rid of. Getting rid of it is not something that is required of the Muslim; rather what is required of him is to refrain from using it in haraam ways, and to use it in the ways that Allaah has permitted.

The problem of desire in a young woman may be solved by taking two steps.

The first step is to reduce and weaken the things that may provoke desire in a person.

This may be achieved in a number of ways, including the following:

1 – Lowering the gaze and refraining from looking at that which Allaah has forbidden. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts)”

[al-Noor 24:31]

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Do not follow one glance with another, for the first is allowed but not the second.” There are many sources of haraam looking, such as looking directly at young men and thinking about their attractive looks, or looking at pictures in magazines and movies.

2 – Avoiding reading stories and novels which focus on the sexual aspect, and avoiding reading internet websites which deal with such topics.

3 – Keeping away from bad company.

4 – Avoiding thinking about desire as much as possible. Thinking in and of itself is not haraam, but if one thinks about it for too long, that may lead a person to haraam actions.

5 – Spending one's time in useful pursuits, because spare time may lead one to fall into haraam things.

6 – Avoiding as much as possible going to public places where young men and women mix.

7 – If a girl is tested with studying in a mixed environment, and cannot find any alternative, she has to remain modest, serious and dignified, and should avoid sitting with young men and speaking to them as much as possible. She should restrict her relationships to friendships with righteous female classmates.

The second step is To strengthen the factors that will prevent one acting in accordance with one’s desires.

This is achieved in a number of ways, including the following:

1 – Strengthening the faith in one’s heart and strengthening one’s relationship with Allaah. This may be achieved by remembering Allaah a great deal, reading Qur’aan, thinking of the names and attributes of Allaah, and doing a lot of naafil prayers. Belief strengthens the heart and soul, and it helps one to resist temptation.

2 – Fasting, as taught by the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) when he said: “O young men, whoever among you can afford to, let him get married, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and in guarding one’s chastity. Whoever cannot afford it, then let him fast, for it will be a shield for him.” This is addressed to young men, but it also includes young women.

3 – Strengthening one’s resolve and willpower, for this will make a young woman able to resist and control her desires.

4 – Remembering what Allaah has prepared for righteous young women. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Verily, the Muslims (those who submit to Allaah in Islam) men and women, the believers men and women (who believe in Islamic Monotheism), the men and the women who are obedient (to Allaah), the men and women who are truthful (in their speech and deeds), the men and the women who are patient (in performing all the duties which Allaah has ordered and in abstaining from all that Allaah has forbidden), the men and the women who are humble (before their Lord Allaah), the men and the women who give Sadaqaat (i.e. Zakaah and alms), the men and the women who observe Sawm (fast) (the obligatory fasting during the month of Ramadaan, and the optional Nawafil fasting), the men and the women who guard their chastity (from illegal sexual acts) and the men and the women who remember Allaah much with their hearts and tongues. Allaah has prepared for them forgiveness and a great reward (i.e. Paradise)”

[al-Ahzaab 33:35]

5 – Thinking about the lives of righteous women who guarded their chastity, such as Maryam, whom Allaah praises in the Qur’aan (interpretation of the meaning):

“And Maryam (Mary), the daughter of ‘Imraan who guarded her chastity. And We breathed into (the sleeve of her shirt or her garment) through Our Rooh [i.e. Jibreel (Gabriel)], and she testified to the truth of the Words of her Lord [i.e. believed in the Words of Allaah: “Be!” and he was; that is ‘Eesa (Jesus), son of Maryam (Mary) as a Messenger of Allaah], and (also believed in) His Scriptures, and she was of the Qaanitoon (i.e. obedient to Allaah)”

[al-Tahreem 66:12]

And thinking about the immoral, fallen women, and comparing between the two types, for there is a huge difference between them.

6 – Choosing righteous companions and spending time with them, so that they can help one another to obey and worship Allaah.

7 – Comparing the effects of immediate fulfillment of desire when a girl responds to haraam, which is followed by loss of pleasure and all that is left is regret and sorrow, with patience and striving against one’s whims and desires, and realizing that the pleasure of conquering one’s whim and desires is far greater than the pleasures of enjoying haraam things.

8 – Seeking help by calling upon Allaah and asking Him for help. The Qur’aan tells us the lesson to be learned from the story of Yoosuf (peace be upon him):

“He said: ‘O my Lord! Prison is dearer to me than that to which they invite me. Unless You turn away their plot from me, I will feel inclined towards them and be one (of those who commit sin and deserve blame or those who do deeds) of the ignorant’

So his Lord answered his invocation and turned away from him their plot. Verily, He is the All‑Hearer, the All‑Knower”

[Yoosuf 12:33 – interpretation of the meaning]

Shaykh Muhammad al-Duwaysh

Praise be to Allaah.

Question:

My Problem is that i can not stop looking so-called clothes girls which do wanton display (tabarruj) {with out islamic hijab} around me in school, market and everywhere in my Country.

Answer:

Praise be to Allaah.

This situation leads to haraam things and major sins, including mixing, touching and zina (unlawful sexual relationships), all of which stem from looking.

Sharee’ah came to forbid the ways that lead to immorality, one of which is looking at non-mahram women.

1 – Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts)”

[al-Noor 24:30]

Imaam Ibn Katheer said:

This is a command from Allaah to His believing slaves to lower their gaze and refrain from looking at that which is forbidden to them. So they should not look at anything except that which they are permitted to look at, and they should lower their gaze and refrain from looking at forbidden things. If it so happens that a person’s gaze accidentally falls upon something forbidden, he should quickly avert his gaze.

Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 3/282

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And when you ask (his wives) for anything you want, ask them from behind a screen, that is purer for your hearts and for their hearts”

[al-Ahzaab 33:53]

3 –

It was narrated that Jareer ibn ‘Abd-Allaah said: “I asked the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) about a sudden glance, and he commanded me to avert my gaze.”

(Narrated by Muslim, 2159)

al-Nawawi said:

What is meant by a “sudden glance” is when a person’s glance unintentionally falls upon a non-mahram woman. There is no sin on him for the first glance, but he must avert his gaze immediately. If he averts his gaze immediately there is no sin on him, but if he continues looking, then he will be a sinner, because of this hadeeth, for the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) commanded him to avert his gaze,

and Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things)”

[al-Noor 24:30]

Men must lower their gaze and refrain from looking at them in all circumstances, unless that is for a valid shar’i reason, such as giving testimony, medical treatment, wanting to propose marriage, buying a slave woman, engaging in financial transactions such as buying and selling, etc. In all these cases it is permissible to look as much as is needed, and no more. And Allaah knows best.

Sharh Muslim, 14/139

Secondly:

There are means which help a person to lower his gaze, and we ask Allaah to help you to do them:

1 – Bearing in mind the fact that Allaah is watching you, that He sees you and is with you (by His knowledge) wherever you go. It may be a secretive glance of which your neighbour is unaware, but Allaah knows of it.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Allaah knows the fraud of the eyes, and all that the hearts conceal”

[Ghaafir 40:19]

2 – Seeking the help of Allaah, beseeching Him and calling upon Him (du’aa’).

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And your Lord said: Invoke Me [i.e. believe in My Oneness (Islamic Monotheism) and ask Me for anything] I will respond to your (invocation).”

[Ghaafir 40:60]

3 – You should know that every blessing you enjoy comes from Allaah, and requires that you should give thanks. Part of the gratitude for the blessing of sight means that you should protect it from looking at that which Allaah has forbidden. Is there any reward for good, other than good? [cf. al-Rahmaan 55:60]

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And whatever of blessings and good things you have, it is from Allaah”

[al-Nahl 16:53]

4 – Striving with your self and training yourself to lower your gaze and be patient in doing so, and not giving up.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning:

“As for those who strive hard in Us (Our Cause), We will surely guide them to Our paths (i.e. Allaah’s religion — Islamic Monotheism)”

[al-‘Ankaboot 29:69]

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever seeks to be chaste, Allaah will make him chaste, and whoever seeks to be independent of means, Allaah will make him independent of means, and whoever strives to be patient, Allaah will make him patient…” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1400)

5 – Avoiding places where a person feels he will be exposed to the temptation of looking, if he can manage to avoid them, such as going to marketplaces or malls, and sitting in the street.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“Beware of sitting in the street.” They said, “We have no alternative; that is where we sit and talk.” He said, “If you insist on sitting there, then give the street its rights.” They said, “What are the rights of the street?” He said, “Lowering the gaze and refraining from causing offence…” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2333; Muslim, 2121).

6 – You should realize that you have no choice in this matter, regardless of what the circumstances are and no matter how great the temptation or motive to do evil, and no matter what emotions and overwhelming desires stir in your heart. You must lower your gaze and refrain from looking at haraam things in all places and at all times. You cannot use excuses such as the environment being corrupt or justify your mistakes by saying that there is a lot of temptation around.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“It is not for a believer, man or woman, when Allaah and His Messenger have decreed a matter that they should have any option in their decision. And whoever disobeys Allaah and His Messenger, he has indeed strayed into a plain error”

[al-Ahzaab 33:36]

7 – Doing a lot of naafil acts of worship, because doing a lot of them whilst also regularly doing obligatory acts of worship is a means of protecting one's physical faculties.

According to a hadeeth qudsi,

Allaah said:

“… and My slave continues to draw close to Me with supererogatory (naafil) works so that I shall love him. And when I love him, I am his hearing with which he hears, his seeing with which he sees, his hand with which he strikes and his foot with which he walks. Were he to ask (something) of Me, I would surely give it to him, and were he to ask Me for refuge, I would surely grant him it.”

(al-Bukhaari, 6137

8 – Remembering that the earth on which sin is committed will bear witness.

Allaah says:

“That Day it will declare its information (about all that happened over it of good or evil)”

[al-Zalzalah 99:4]

9 – Remembering the angels who are recording your deeds.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“But verily, over you (are appointed angels in charge of mankind) to watch you,

Kiraaman (Honourable) Kaatibeen —writing down (your deeds),

They know all that you do”

[al-Infitaar 82:10-12]

10 – Bearing in mind some of the texts which forbid letting the gaze wander freely, such as the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things)”

[al-Noor 24:30]

11 – Avoiding looking unnecessarily, so that you only look at what you need to look at, and you do not let your gaze wander right and left so that it falls upon something the effects and fitnah of which cannot be got rid of quickly.

12 – Marriage, which is one of the most effective remedies.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“Whoever can afford it, let him get married, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and in guarding one’s chastity. And whoever cannot afford it, let him fast, for it will be a shield for him.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1806; Muslim, 1400).

13 – Fasting – because of the hadeeth quoted above.

14 – Doing obligatory acts of worship as Allaah has commanded, such as prayer.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Verily, As‑Salaah (the prayer) prevents from Al‑Fahshaa’ (i.e. great sins of every kind, unlawful sexual intercourse) and Al‑Munkar (i.e. disbelief, polytheism, and every kind of evil wicked deed)”

[al-‘Ankaboot 29:45]

15 – Remembering al-hoor al-‘ayn, which will give you a motive to be patient in avoiding that which Allaah has forbidden, hoping to get al-hoor al-‘ayn.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Companions of Equal Age ”

[al-Naba’ 78:33]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“… If a woman of the people of Paradise were to look out over the people of this earth, it would light up everything in between and fill it with fragrance, and the veil of her head is better than this world and everything in it.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2643).

16 – Bearing in mind the shortcomings of the one who is looked at and the filth and waste material they carry in their gut.

17 – Being ambitious and focusing on nobler things.

18 – Checking on yourself from time to time and striving to make yourself lower your gaze whilst realizing that everyone makes mistakes.

19 – Thinking of the pain and regret that will result from this looking, and the effects of letting one’s gaze wander.

20 – Understanding the benefits of lowering one's gaze, as mentioned above.

21 – Bringing up this topic in meetings and gatherings, and explaining its dangers.

22 – Advising your relatives, telling them not to wear clothes that attract attention and show their attractions, such as how they dress, wearing bright colours, how they walk, speaking too softly, etc.

23 – Warding off passing thoughts and whispers from the Shaytaan before they take hold and are acted upon. Whoever lowers his gaze after the first glance will be saved from innumerable problems, but if he keeps looking he cannot be certain that seeds that will be difficult to remove will not be planted in his heart.

25 – Being afraid of a bad end, and of feeling regret at the point of death.

26 – Keeping company with good people, because you are naturally affected by the characteristics of the people you mix with, and a person will follow the way of his close friend, and a friend will pull you to follow his way.

27 – Knowing that the zina of the eye is looking, and that should be sufficient to put you off.

Adapted from an essay entitled Ghadd al-Basr (Lowering the Gaze) by a student of sharee’ah.

And Allaah knows best.

Islam Q&A

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SOURCE LINK: http://islamqa.com/en/ref/20229

Published by: Mohammad Rana Usman Nisar

In the Name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.

Oh, Men of Muslim community, stop looking at women

|Just Short admonisher|

Allah says:

Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). That is purer for them. Verily, Allah is All-Aware of what they do.

[Surah Al-Nur verse 30]

Jareer ibn ‘Abdullaah said:

"I asked the Messenger of Allaah (Peace & Blessings of Allaah be upon Him) about an accidental glance at a woman. He commanded me to turn my gaze away."
(Reported by al-Tirmidhi, who said: This is a saheeh hasan hadeeth. See al-Sunan, 2700).

Commenting on this hadeeth, al-Mubaarakpoori said:

" ‘Accidental’ means that his gaze fell on a non-mahram woman unintentionally. ‘He commanded me to turn my gaze away’ means that he was not to look a second time, because the first glance was not by choice and would be forgiven, but any further glances would be counted as sin, and he should heed the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning): ‘Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things)…’ [al-Noor 24:30]"

The Messenger of Allaah (Peace & Blessings of Allaah be upon Him) said:

"O Ali, do not follow a glance with another, for you will be forgiven for the first, but not for the second."

(Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 2701; see Saheeh al-Jaami’, 7953)

In al-Tuhfah, he said:

"The words ‘do not follow a glance with another’ mean do not look again after the first glance. ‘You will be forgiven for the first’ means that you will be forgiven if the first glance was unintentional, and ‘but not for the second’ means that because the second glance was by choice, it will be counted against you."

So it is clear that deliberately looking at a non-mahram woman and continuing to look after a first accidental glance is haraam. It is forbidden to look at any part of her body, whether you think she is beautiful or not, whether it provokes sexual desire or not, whether it is accompanied by evil thoughts or not, and whether it leads to immoral deeds or not.

We ask Allaah to protect you and us from all haraam deeds. Allaah is the One Who guides to the Straight Path.
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SOURCE:

ISLAMQA

QURAN.COM

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